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We are happy to report that a number of volunteer organizations have written grants to cover the cost of ordering a copy of If Only You Would Ask for all of their volunteers.  This book makes a great gift for anyone who spends time with the elderly.  Substantial discounts are available for orders of over 50 books.  The more you order, the greater the discount!

Contact Joan Bachman at or 507-358-5792 for details.

Mom and I will be presenting at the upcoming National Caregiving Conference in Chicago, November 8-11.  We have entered If Only You Would Ask in the Caregiving Technology and Product Pitch Event. Voting has opened! We would appreciate your support!

NCC18 Presenters: Eileen Opatz Berger and Joan Berger Bachman

Join Eileen and Joan for their session during our Third Annual National Caregiving Conference:

If Only You Would Ask: A Guide to Spending Quality Time with the Elderly on Friday at 5 p.m.
When visiting or caring for an elderly relative or friend, are you often at a loss for what to talk about? After the initial pleasantries, do the minutes/hours drag on? You may very well love this person, but find yourself struggling to carry on a conversation. Moments of silence seem endless. If Only You Would Ask: A Guide to Spending Quality Time with the Elderly transforms this situation!

Five years in the making, If Only You Would Ask is a conversational manual, a resource, and a tool for those who spend time with and care for the elderly. No longer will you find yourself struggling to think of something interesting to talk about. With 42 topics and over 400 questions, If Only You Would Ask provides a framework for tapping into memories that may not have been thought about or talked about for years. You and the person you are visiting care for will both enjoy your time together. In fact, you will look forward to your next get together. conversation.

Everyone has stories to share, if only we ask the right questions! For more information visit our website at

To learn more about Joan, watch our video discussion about finding our best, which aired as part for our Virtual Caregiving Summit in May.

~ NCC18 Registration ~ NCC18 Virtual Registration ~ NCC18 In-Person Registration(Chicago) ~ NCC18 Volunteer Registration ~
~ Testimonials ~ NCC18 CEUs ~ NCC18 Costs ~

We are so grateful to the following sponsors for making our conference possible:

We enjoyed a wonderful day at Barnes and Noble talking about our book!  Awards for farthest distance traveled to get a signed copy go to Kieu Vu from Madison, Wisconsin, Margaret Prugh from Ham Lake and Janewit Wangboonsin from Minneapolis!  We so appreciated everyone who stopped by to offer support and good wishes!

I'm pleased to announce that If Only You Would Ask will be featured this coming weekend, Saturday, May 5th, at Barnes and Noble Bookstore in Rochester!  We'll be there ready to sign books between 11:00 and 3:00!  Could be the perfect Mother's Day Gift!  Hope to see a crowd!!

Eileen was a featured author at the Tucson Book Fair in March.  Wheatmark Publishers has a booth at the fair and published authors are invited to promote their books.  Attended by thousands of book lovers, it was an opportunity to spread the word about If Only You Would Ask.  Special thanks to family friend Marilyn Mosio Grass who was Eileen's #1 promotional assistant!

I'm happy to report that Mayo Clinic Radio will be broadcasting our interview regarding If Only You Would Ask tomorrow morning, Saturday, February 10th! You can hear it locally on KROC-AM between 9:00-10 a.m. Central Time. Other Mayo Clinic Radio affiliates, which carry the program at various times can be found at

According to Jen O'Hara, Producer Mayo Clinic Radio, our You Tube video was their MOST WATCHED last month!!
And, here’s the link to the You Tube video just in case you haven't seen it!

Thanks for all the great support. We appreciate you spreading the word about our book. Joan and Eileen

Mayo Clinic Radio, a weekly one-hour radio program brings you health and medical information on interesting topics from Mayo Clinic specialists [...]

I received the following message today from a Rochester friend, Brad Currier.  His experience using If Only You Would Ask with his Mom suggests another valuable way to use the book.

Brad wrote:

Thank you for your great book!  I just got off the phone with my 101 year old mom after our best conversation in years! We spent over 30 minutes talking about her grade school years. I learned that there were bullies “but they never bothered me because my 4 brothers would have killed them!” I also learned that her favorite song was “There’s a rainbow around my shoulders.” I only knew 2 lines and I sang them all the time -that is until my brothers told me to shut up ‘cause I was driving them crazy! The second line was the sky is blue above.”  It was amazing how she seemed to get progressively more engaged. Her hearing and processing got better and better throughout the call and she genuinely thanked me for the call when we said good bye. Joan, you and your Mom are brilliant! I love talking with her but her failing memory gave us little to talk about- until now! Thanks again!  Brad Currier




January 8, 2018

We enjoyed a wonderful morning with the AAUW's Writer's Group.  For over  20 years, Eileen has been a part of the writer's group called Memories into Memoirs.  It was thanks to participation in this group that she came up with many of the topics and questions for If Only You Would Ask.  The group was enthusiastic in its endorsement of the book and could see its usefulness in a wide range of situations!

Eileen will plan to make a presentation at a general AAUW Meeting in the upcoming months.